“The reward of our work is not what we get, but what we become,” says Brazilian author Paolo Coehlo. He may have intended those words to speak to the writer, but they also speak to other work…to my work and probably to your work.
The reward of great conflict resolution and successful negotiation isn’t just what we get from it — our peace of mind, an acceptable path forward, a decision well made, a stronger personal or professional relationship — it’s who we become by the way we do it.
Do we become the person who wins at the cost of important relationships around him? Do we become the person martyred by her own avoidance habit? Do we become the person who leaves debris in her wake?
Or do we choose differently when in conflict, when negotiating, knowing that in so doing we are making a conscious choice not just to get something, but to become something better?